Whoop De Do Da!

WOW has it been a minute since i've last posted on here ! Too, too much has happened within the last few months to even begin blogging about. First and foremost i wanna thank GOD for giving me yet another day of life. Above all, life is good! Doo da doo! Second, i have alot to say, just dont feel like typing too much right now cause i HAVE been up ALLLLL night =]

First, since the last time i blogged, i had NO job -__- and now, i do! thank you GOD! Since mid June (the 15th to be exact, haha how IRONIC... read previous blogs to know what im talking about) i started working as a part-time assistant manager at a store called Styles For Less. NO i did not know wtf that company was until i got interviewed for it. Got the job by a miracle of GOD as well. Just a random email for a position i didn't even think i qualified for. Only God knows.. So its been almost 3 months since ive been working there. I love it, most days. Love the ppl there, etc.

Also since the last time i blogged i had no BF! lol. Well Derek and i have been dating since June as well... going on 3 months in 2 days! whoop! Or AM i that excited? -__- he is great! has been thru SOO much with me the past few months its amazing what he puts up with <3 I got a new BLACKBERRY! WOOT! Its the Blackberry 8520 that was recently released. Its in a "frost" color aka bby blue! NO rolly bally thingy! its a trackpad. SOO much better! so thin, so perfect! Except for me throwing it in syrup a few moments ago -___- BUT yeah, T-Mobile Babyy! If u have BBM or Tmobile, let me give you my digits. and NOW i see why they call it CRACKberry. I am SOO addicted! =]

Third.. STILL haven't started college.. GAHHH when will i ever?! I want to. I REALLY do.. its just circumstances... ughh ! Still loving my besties Danielle && Brittney whom i miss SOOOO much ! Met some AMAY-ZING ppl through twitter/myspace recently! Cory & Lanie ! 2 girls that are sooo unique and soooo lovable and so inspiring. Gahh! They rock! Then there is this chick named Miley.. NOOO not MILEY CYRUS dude! Like, when will i ever get the chance to talk to someone like her! That'll be the day! Bahahaha! *wink wink* ANYWHO, i loooove my Ray of sunshine! She is amazing on soo many levels, so real, so down to earth, so.. my kinda person and they type of friend i need in my life! Along wiff Cory & Lanie && Pageyy .. all 5 of us are Y5 aka CLAMP! hahaha ! Couldn't of found a better name! I love my girls soooo much!

Other than the overly annoying and overly exaggerated vocal yells my mother gives at home on a daily basis... and the being broke all the time... life is GOOD! for now.. troubles are gonna come our way, but as long as we're prepared, it'll be okay.. HEY that rhymed! I hope God knows how much i APPRECIATE him and LOVE him and am SOO THANKFUL for everything he has given me even though i dont express it as much as i should!

So thanks SO much for reading, thanks for caring! I love you ALLL! <33
-Ashh

I Still Live With The Side Effects

So i'm finally home from that long drawn out trip of mine from Buffalo. Remember how i had to wait @ the JFK airport for so long? Well it paid off cause i got bumped up to first class! I was in seat 2A. It was great! You get so spoiled lol. This guy that worked there was nice enough to upgrade me outta nowhere! :)

So im back to this place called home. I really can't stand my mother. She is driving me to the point of insanity. So manipulative. All she is after is the money i DON'T have. WTF. Ugh i can't even blog about it cause it makes me mad. I'm pretty sure im gonna be in my room for the majority of the time. I have no intention of seeing anyone here. I miss my friends in Buffalo! I wish i was living up there. Everything was so
carefree. I need a plan. A plan for my life.

*sigh* So i was just about to cry and my mother knocks on the door to show me a singing snowman on a piano. wtf. That shit is not even cute! Why can't i ever be happy? Like seriously if i did something to deserve all this then let me know what it was so i can freaking repent! It's just not fair. Not fair for anyone and it sucks.

I need a job. I cannot be without a job. I can't be stuck in this house forever. Plus i got bills to pay. *sigh* there is not much else i can say or do. Just wait patiently.

<3 Ashh

A Series Of Unfortunate Events

As i write this i am sitting in a recharge station in New York City @ the JFK airport. If anything i should have been 35,000 feet in the air on my way to Miami now but noooooo. My first flight had to be delayed an hour because of maintenance issues which made me miss my connecting flight. At first i had hope that we were going to make it. Original departure time was 6am. We left at 7am. My connecting flight departed at 8:15am, we arrived at 8:20am... sooo i was re-booked onto a flight @ 1pm. That's FOUR, no wait, almost FIVE hours in a fricking airport full of weird people with this random Swine Flu that just appeared.

But anyhow, enough venting. I enjoyed my week in Buffalo. It was A LOT of fun. I saw people i hadn't seen in years and i'm so happy that i did. I think one of the best parts of my trip was yesterday when i went to my elementary/middle school to visit. I could not believe how that place has changed in the 5 years since i graduated from there. Some of the same teachers are still there. Most put a smile on my face. I got to spend part of the day with Lilliam and the other part with Janice. Two old friends of mine, now with children lol.

I'm kinda sad that i had to leave but at the same time im not. When i said bye to Brittney i hugged her like 12 times lol. I love that girl sooo much and imma miss her terribly even though i know we'll be in contact almost everyday. I had sooo much fun with her and had my first drunken experience with her lmaoo. "Memories". I can't wait till she comes down to Miami in the summer. I really hope that she does cause that would be a blast.

So as i wait for this next flight of mine i am just going to be here, killing precious time. I'm actually in no kind of hurry to get back to that Miami heat (not the team) lol. IDK exactly what i'll be doing once im there since i have no job but i will try to make good use of the time and go job hunting again. Oy.

Wish me a safe trip (even though i know it will be a safe one) and i'll blog for ya lataaaaa. ;) <3 Ashh

Party In The Club

Soo Britt and i went clubbing last night. It was fun, at first. We were dancing with random guys lol. Britt was "drunk" but she says she wasn't. The alcohol had no effect on me at all whatsoever lol. We went downtown to a place called "Pure". They played wack music. It sucked. We got there at like 1:30am. Left at around 3:30am. Went to Jim's Steakhouse & saw Joshua. Boy has he changed! OMG! Then got home @ around 4:30am, got into PJ's and we both knocked the fcuk out! Woke up at like 10ish cause Britt had to go to school so i went with her. Came back to her house, knocked out for like 2 hours lol.

I went to my old church and saw my friend Janice. She hasn't changed. Saw her parents and brother. Then i went where Britt was cause she went to meet with her friend Seth. SO anyhow, now we tryna get ready to go to the town ballroom in downtown for the "Blackout" party. Meagan is here. Jamie is picking us up! I miss her! Haven't seen her in years! OMG i love this im having a blast seeing everyone after sooo long! I hope we have fun tonight. This is exciting and i'm taking pictures of every moment so check my facebook ;)

There are soo many things i wanna do and soo many people i wanna see but soo little time. Sometimes i wish i lived down here still. All my peoples are here. & then some haters. But anyhow,m i needa start getting ready! What do i wear? IDK!

I'll keep ya posted! ;) Good night! <3

For The Nostalgia

So i am finally in Buffalo. I had a great flight. No problems. A lil turbulence when landing in Buffalo. Actually, a lot of it. Got me dizzy for a bit. But above all it was good. Aside from sitting next to two old smelly guys on the second flight, and a fat snoring one on the first. OH! And it was freezing! I came in sandals. Big mistake lol. I was shivering. It was a blinding cold i had not felt in a loooong time.

When i got here the girl that was nice enough to give me a ride was waiting right at the gate for me. Baggage was delayed. Finally arrived @ Brittney's house. When i saw her i ran up to her and hugged her soooo tight! Like i lifted her up from the floor... twice. Yes there was screaming lol. A happy scream :)

It seems surreal that im actually here because honestly, it seems as if i never left and Ive been here forever. A lot of the places look a little bit different but Ive only seen a bit of the city. I still have to explore more of my once loved city. I can't wait to see people i had not seen in so long. I'm super excited. I just wish i had a car :(

Tomorrow should arrive my eye glasses that i am not too happy about but i was kinda rushed and stuff. So whatever. At least i have new ones and contacts :) Today has been a long day and i cant believe it's not even over yet! Whoa. I'm pumped. Tomorrow we are going Clubbing! YAY! Ok so anyhow, this is my vacation and i am going to enjoy it to the fullest. It has been well earned. I'll blog later this week!

"Forget About Yesterday, Don't Worry About Tomorrow, Just Live Your Life Today"

Da Double Dee Double Di

Today has got to be the day where i have a zillion things to do & so i wake up, and here i am laying in bed writing this! This laziness and procrastination is so hard to shake off. It runs through my blood lol. In exactly 24 hours I'll be on a plane to Buffalo and i have not packed a single thing. Don't have clean clothes, haven't even found the suitcase. oy.

I still need to go to the eye doctor to put in my prescription. that should be taken care of today. I wanna do my hair cause it's nappy. Straight is always easier. WOW i'm watching the weather channel and they just said "Or you can Twitter us to give us your ideas..." LMAOO. Everyone has Twitter. How disconcerting. So anyhow, I told my mom we were leaving in 7 mins and she's getting ready... i'm still in bed O_o

I'm actually feeling good about myself today. I feel like today might be good day. I think i better go get ready. I'll blog a little bit laterrrr. ;)

Philippians 4:13

What a day. Its funny how God works. Last night, i was on Facebook (shocking right? lol) and i saw a girl named Ana online. Now, I talk to her every once in a while. She goes to my church. Her & her twin sister sing with the worship team. So anyhow, i decided to say hi cause i hadn't seen her in a while. She has always been super nice to me. And you know, she asked me how I've been and i said "Well, I've been kinda depressed and angry cause i just lost my job and I've been stressed." so all she said was "Would you like me to pray with you?" and i said SURE!

She called me and almost immediately began praying. I felt so relieved. That was really nice of her to do that. Mind you it was midnight! So anyhow, my plan for today was to go to the MDC Kendall Campus to turn in some paperwork's that i still needed for my class next semester. So i asked my mom to come with me cause i didn't wanna go alone. As i was getting ready, i got a call from a place i had sent my resume to at Dadeland Mall through Monster.com a couple days ago. The woman i spoke to was asking if i could come for an interview and i said sure but i was going out of state in a few days. She asked me if i could make it TODAY! It worked out perfectly cause MDC is like 5 mins away from the mall!

I was super nervous cause for one, i hate interviews. I get soo nervous but my mom said PRAY! So i did and i felt much better. I also know my dorknob prayed for me too ;) I got all fancied up cause that is a very classy mall. I arrived and my mom prayed for it to all go well. I felt great when i walked in that door. The interview went great! I was offered full time and key holder! I feel good about this job and i PRAYYYYY they call me back. They said they need people very quickly so my chances are pretty good. Its pretty far. About a 25-30 min drive but well worth it. Im soo excited. Then I went to The Cheesecake Factory with my mom since she had never been. That was great. Then I finally got to MDC and while im there, i get a phone call...

I was told that my manager from my previous job just got laid off. I was like O_o Whattt!?! & how'd that happen!? Anyhow, I was stuck in traffic for like an hour. That gets me very impatient. Got home just in time before it started thundering and pouring rain.

Im like ecstatic because it amazes me how God works! You may not understand it when it happens, but later on it'll be revealed to you and it'll all start making sense. That job is mine. I declare it. I put it in God's hands though. He is in control now. I leave in 2 days to Buffalo and as excited as i may be, im still a lil nervous bout the flight but i know everything will be okay. I just know it.

I've learned my lesson. Now it's time to take stand and take charge and do things the right way. I'm ready, so bring it on! ;)



"There's always going to be another mountain, I'm always going to want to make it move. Always going to be an uphill battle, Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose. Ain't about how fast I get there, Ain't about what's waiting on the other side... It's The Climb" -Miley Cyrus

Joel Osteen.

I was listening to a cd by Joel Osteen and man did i get a good laugh. He was talking about how we should take care of our physical body by eating right. I really liked that whole preach.

So anyhow, he read this poem to the audience that i just thought was wayyy funnier than it shoulda been. It said:

God, Grant me the strength,
Not to fall,
Into the clutches,
Of cholesterol.

At polyunsaturates,
I'll never mutter,
For the road to hell,
Is paved with butter.

And cake is cursed,
And cream is awful,
And Satan is hiding,
In every waffle.

Beelzebub is a chocolate drop,
In Lucifer is a lollipop.
Teach me the evils of fried chicken from the South..
Lord, if you love me, shut my mouth

LOL! Isn't that funny? Yes, yes it is :D

So watch what cha eat folks. I know i will ;)

FML.

Sooo, today didn't turn out the way i thought it would. *sigh* I was fired from my job. Yes, fired. The job i had for 1 year and 5 months. Oh wait, how ironic that i started on November 15th and got fired on April 15th? Hmmm.

I'm an emotional mess. Ive been crying non stop. But actually i haven't been crying because of the fact that i got fired. Just the fact that i feel betrayed. You think you know someone and then you get stabbed with a knife sharper than cheddar cheese :P

I wanted to leave that place. Just not today. Not without having another job. And wanna know the best part? I get home only to get yelled at by my mother telling me that i have to pay $400 in rent next month no matter what! Isn't that great? SO the only person i have to turn to is my girl Danielle who thank God has ALWAYS been there for me no matter what. What would i do w/o my dork?

SO i wanna apply for unemployment but i just don't know how. I don't know what to do with my life at this point. I feel like i have nothing to look forward to. Like my dork says, "Jesus, whenever your ready!!". Thankfully i only have a tiny bit of money left that i can work with. Or maybe not since everything i have is what my effin mother is claiming i have to pay. We'll see about that one.

Soo yeah i don't have anything else to say other than i'm sad but i'll get over it soon enough. I'll be posting more blogs. Hey, this is a relief. i like writing :)

A Little Better

I woke up a little early today considering i have to work later. I usually don't wake up till an hour before i actually have to work. Yup, im lazy like that ;] I don't know exactly how i feel right now but i do know i feel just a little bit better. Now, i don't know how i'll feel when i walk through the doors at work. That's a whole other story.

I'm excited cause one week from today ill be on a plane to Buffalo. I'm still a little nervous about flying alone but hey, i know Jesus will be holding me tight so i'll be safe =] i'll also have my ipod and laptop along for the ride, for entertainment purposes lol.

*sigh* the other day i was writing yet again some more random stuff on my phone just to kill time and this is what i came up with...

"underneath the wings of an angel lies a child too frightened to speak. chained to a troubled past and a heart so hurt its weak. she whispers almost silently please don't leave my side. keep me under your wings just take me for the ride."

It's not quite finished but it's a start. These random words just pop out in my head and i have to let them out in any way possible weather it be on paper, thru texts, on my computer. I wrote another poem too earlier this week. I think i actually impressed myself lol. It's all good. I need to start developing my talent more and start putting it to good use. I'm just too lazy! like i said lol.

I guess i should start getting ready for work since i take forever and a day and usually end up late. blah. i have to cut that habit. so anyhow, i'll be back for more blogging laterrrr =]

thanks for reading && thanks for caring <33